Posted by: Jane | November 18, 2015

M.T.F. and F.T.M.

Mercury, Toluene, Flouride is bad. ok?

so is:

Flouride, Toluene, Mercury. Mercury, Toluene, Flouride.

Flouride in the water, is bad. making Bad Water out of Good Water.

Toluene comes from Gas Wells, Petroleum seeps. It has no business being used for: Haldoll, Thorazine, Trilafondle, Zyprexa, Seroquel, Geodon,  Abilify, Latuda, all antipsychotics/neuroleptics that causes Central Nervous System death… like VX1, and ZyklonB.

Lipitor (statins based on Ansel Keyes bogus cholesterol science. You need Fat, which has cholesterol, which helps your brain (made of fatty tissue), and your Central Nervous System, (myelin sheathing) and hormones as follows:  Fat: cholestrol > DHEA > Pregnenalone > Estrogen or Pregnenalone > Androgen > Progesterone, or Androgen > Adrenal Cortisoid > Testosterone

Abortion pills.

Lupron for hormone treatment



pretty obvious.

Mercury is a liquid metal used in mercury switches (parachute switches, explosive devices, thermometers). It has no business being added to a Petri dish cultivation of a bacteria, or a virus, then put in a Plastic or Glass syringe, and injected into a little girl’s bloodstream before she starts First Grade/Elementary School.

Ask any Hazardous Materials Handler that works for OSHA (Occupational Safety and Hazards Act) about the MSDS (Material Safety Date Sheet) about mercury. Mercury will kill you dead from the fumes alone if you are not situationally aware at all times while handling it, in heavy industry or materials and chemical sciences. So why does the Obama Administration allow this…?


who knows…

Posted by: Jane | September 20, 2015

Why won’t psychiatrists debunk me? Go ahead. Do it.

It has been nearly five years since I published my testimony of using meditation to cure myself of a severe, life-threatening, incurable genetic chemical imbalance brain disorder. I have since rang the bells of the New England Journal of Medicine, the bastion of online support, John Grohol’s Psych Central, Harvard Psychiatry, and Kay Redfield Jamison, and the entire bio-epigenics mood and thought disorder team at John Hopkins University, claiming the be the discoverer or inventor of not only the cure for Manic Depression, but Clinical Depression, Generalized Anxiety, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and Attention Deficit Disorder

I am wide open for three or four psychiatrists to go over my book with a tooth and comb, looking for weaknesses in my methodology. Experts debunk fake cures all the time in the name of public good. Bipolar Disorder is now a full-on mental health epidemic (in America only, interestingly) and thousands if not millions of children are being diagnosed with bipolar, with no evidenced-based science to back them up.

I have offered to have my brain chemicals analyzed for imbalances, my genes profiled for manic depressive “clusters” and my brain scanned to see if I am suffering cortical degradation from a lack of “protective” lithium.

Did you hear what I just told you? I am the inventor of the cure for modern mental illness. Analyze my process, and debunk me on the world stage. Explain how it is not possible to go on a life-retreat for five years, and spend forty hours weekly doing Bellevue-banned Tai Chi Chuan, and highly advanced meditation techniques that are passed down from either Buddha, or Lao Tsu or both.

What are you waiting for? This is the claim of the century! Debunk me Harvard! Review my book at Psych Central and debunk me, John Grohol! Debunk me, Kay Redfield Jamison! Sit down with a few senior Harvard and John Hopkins psychiatrists, and take down my book with a scientific critique of how what I did, isn’t possible.

Go ahead.

My book, my meditation method for overcoming a psychiatric death sentence of incurable Manic Depression is Nobel Prize material. It is. And you all know it. I am the real deal healer of the mind The rest of you are mundanes. Practically apes trying to figure out what a spaceship is. I have the blueprint for healing the mind, and none of you do. The fact that I am a high-school dropout and was slated to spend my entire teenage and adult life on the grounds of a State Mental Asylum has got to burn at least a little.

In previous posts, I explained why parents, psychiatric nurses, and psychiatrists all conspire to coerce or force underage children to take chemical lobotomy medications. The idea is to “make them take their medicine whether they want it or not”. It is literally, to violate the child, before the child is mature enough, legal savvy enough, or strong enough, mentally and physically, to refuse meds. Basically, rape. That is why I now call Trilafon, “Trilafondle”. Because a psychiatrist took my drug virginity away from me without my consent.

And not just any drug. Not like, say, pain killers, which you might take for a few days, and stop. Oh no. I was never ever supposed to stop this medicine/drug/toxin, ever. I had been sentenced to live from the age of fourteen, to the age of my death, in a mind and body perpetually mangled by a class of chemicals psychiatry inherited from Big Industrial, via Big Pharma.

Have you ever smelled a liquid antipsychotic? Bearing in mind, if you take the pill version, you don’t smell it. And if they are pinning you down with an army of med techs, and driving a syringe into you against your will and pumping you full of this stuff in its liquid form, protected by the plastic syringe, you don’t smell what they just put in you, to “hook you up with the good stuff for your chemical imbalance for the next month”.

Have you ever smelled nail polish? What about paint thinner?

nail polish paint thinner

You might use nail polish, but the smell alone is enough of a bio-warning, never to consume it. You might use paint thinner, but there is something alarming about the odor, the fumes, that tells you, in a bio-warning inside your body somewhere, that it would be suicide to drink it. Our nose, generally knows when something is not healthy for us.

If I forced you to drink a medicine cup full of a clear liquid, that smelled very alarming biologically-speaking, you would panic. If I made you swallow it, you would immediately feel that I had poisoned you deliberately. You would feel assaulted. Violated.

dose cup

When I was told to begin taking 1500 mg of liquid Trilafondle daily, they told me I had utterly no choice. The smell of the liquid antipsychotic/neuroleptic, was extremely similar to both paint thinner, and nail polish.

I was told by my psychiatrists, that every day that I refused to drink it, I would be tackled to the ground, restrained, and injected against my will.  At least when I was at home being abused by my parents, I could resist. I fought back as I got older. Here, fighting back wouldn’t end in a tense stalemate. Here, in the asylum, fighting being medically “helped”, resulted in being ganged up on, and assaulted.

No one in the entire psychiatric facility told me about the litany of effects that drug/toxin/chemical would do to me. No one told me about Tardives Dyksenisa, or TD, also known as neuroleptic malignancy syndrome: the consequence of taking neuroleptics, until a fatal medicine bullet is triggered, and your nervous system malfunctions constantly, for the rest of your natural life. All were acceptable risks apparently, decided for me, by adults wearing medical clothing.

But the thing is, as an adult, as I prepared the notes for my book, I researched Trilafon in a way that was never allowed to me as a minor teenager. I read the entire Materials Safety Data Sheet that comes with a boxed-up bottle of Perphenazine/Trilafon.

The List of Warnings included “do not allow this substance to come into contact with clothing”

Are you serious? Not ok for clothing, but okay for my brain and digestive system and glands? Excuse me? Then I look at all of Bob Whitaker’s notes on the timelines of the use of neuroleptics, and “ah ha!” there it is, the missing link. Perphenazines were used in the manufacture of clothing dye.

When I compared Trilafon to other more popularly known antipsychotic/neuroleptics, I discovered that Trilafon was described as being similar to Haldol, and was considered 30% more “potent” as a “hypnotic” and “tranquilizer” than Thorazine, which inspired the phrase, “Doing the Thorazine shuffle”.

You do the Thorazine shuffle, because all your brain and nervous system functions don’t work properly with a tincture of nail polish/acetone/paint stripper flowing through your body, organs, and brain.

But there was something slightly different about Trilafon, that I noticed, in its chemical make-up, which might account for the horror show of “greater than Thorazine potency”.

It had an extra chemical chain called “Piperazine”.

I then looked up what Piperazine is used for.

It turns out, that Piperazine, is also an industrial chemical, used extensively in the making of plastic.

plastic cube light

If the psychiatric drug you are thinking of putting into the bodies of babies, children and teens in the throes of puberty says that there is a warning for Tardives Dyskenisa, you never ever put that toxin into a living being without their express and heavily informed consent, or you are Frankenstein Mengele, a medical torturer. And just think, you can justify that chemical torture on chemical imbalances that were never proved, and genetics, which also were never proved, making you part of the mad science show of medical experimentation.

Do you honestly think that anyone at the headquarters of where they make Trilafon would have remotely cared if I had died in the State Asylum so I could escape being on Trilafondle all my life? Do you think the Pharma Company would have brought my body home to my mother with a Plastics and Chemistry Logo Flag draped over it, and apologize that I was one of the ones who just couldn’t get along with Trilafon in my life, and she would have received financial compensation or reward or damages for my suicide? No way.

In the previous post, I discussed two very good reasons for never nailing down the diagnosis of bipolar disorder with an actual laboratory or clinical test.

  1. to widen the net of people that can be diagnosed with an opinion-based mental disorder, making them eligible for life-long medication treatment therapy
  2. creating medical proof of who has bipolar disorder and who does not, lessens the number of people with the actual disorder, and renders entire populations ineligible for being misdiagnosed and multi-medicated for manic depression. it would also expose the almost certain reality, that there are millions of Americans all walking around with a false medical condition, and taking meds for no medically provable reason, and frees them from both the bipolar diagnoses and all that goes with it, as well as their “responsibility to the public” to be walking around medicated all the time.

However, psychiatrists have now insisted that there are three reasons you have an opinion-based medical disorder called bipolar/manic depression:

  1. manic depression is genetic
  2. manic depression is a particular brain chemical imbalance
  3. manic depression can be seen in the prefrontal lobes of those with the diagnosis

They are positive that these three factors mean or rather, cause or implicate the condition itself.

So how does one go about avoiding being diagnosed erroneously with a neuron-brain chemical-genetic disorder?

You do not agree to be seen by a psychiatrist until he or she can run you through all of those tests.

They have said manic depression is a chemical imbalance, since the 70s or perhaps even earlier. They have had forty-five years or more, to prove that theory, and it has never been proven, and it’s because they themselves do not actually believe it.

Call up John Hopkins or ask to visit their psychiatry department, and go through labs and classrooms until you find the team working on unriddling the serotonin and dopamine profile for people alleged to have bipolar disorder, so everyone that needs that diagnosis so desperately can get the accurate medical test needed for proper diagnosis. I guarantee there is no one at John Hopkins investigating a resolution of the chemical imbalance claim, right now.

Under the leadership of Kay Redfield Jamison, they continue to insist that bipolar disorder is a genetic disorder and they have a genetic research team. Why have they made no leaps forward in ten years, despite the human genome being decoded? They are positive it’s genetic, so wait for the gene test before allowing yourself to be diagnosed with an incurable disorder the treatment of which is lifelong medications that never cure the condition.

Ask for the prefrontal cortex PET scan, to see if your prefrontal cortex matches up with their established bipolar frontal cortex deficiency scan profiles.

If they don’t have a chemical test for a mental disorder after 45 years of telling patients, “Be patient. We are working on it” all this time as molecular medicine advances have leaped since the 80s, it is not happening.

If they don’t have a genetic test for manic depression with the decoded human genome sitting in front of their faces, there is not a gene for bipolar, or it’s not a genetic disorder.

If they have a brain-scan test for bipolar prefrontal cortex issues, then get the test done and see if your brain looks like the ones they scanned and made notes of, before you take brain-altering drugs based on the opinion that you might have this now-detectable-in-the-cortex brain disorder.

If they won’t test you for the bipolar gene, the brain chemistry profile, or the brain electrical profile, they are not being medically scientific or transparent and you are in danger of becoming a medication experiment victim like I was.

The worst of it is, none of these psychiatrists will fess up and tell you it’s a scam to get maximum numbers of people medicated under what amounts to false pretenses. None has ever apologized to me for what my psychiatrists did to me, nor congratulated me on my mental health meditation magic that cured me of depression over fifteen years ago against my original prognosis of spending my teens, and my adults years, in an Insane Asylum on lithium and trilafon/perphenazine all the years of my life – both chemicals eroding my brain, glands, cns, and it’s all just too bad. It’s the best they could do they said, I was just unlucky to have this genetic brain chemical cortex disorder. Too bad for me.


  1. no psychiatrist will own up to Kay Redfield and Co, being wrong about me
  2. no psychiatrist will congratulate me on beating an incurable condition
  3. no psychiatrist can ever challenge me – that I did not cure the condition unless…
  4. they want to claim I was just misdiagnosed.

All that medical horror, was actually just meant for real manic depressives, not you Jane. Sorry, you actually went through all of that, for nothing. And no one from John Hopkins Psychiatry or Harvard Psychiatry, will ever care, or ever recompense you for that massive medically-mutilating mental-health diagnosis mistake, and they care even less, that you cured their incurable condition.

The test for bipolar would help cement the insanity of all the bipolar psychiatry, for it would either show that

  1. I didn’t have the bipolar gene, the bipolar brain chemical imbalance, or the bipolar brain pattern, which means my cure is medically proven, or at least it was effective, for me
  2. I do have the bipolar gene, the bipolar brain chemical imbalance, and the bipolar brain pattern, and yet have somehow, magically remained without suicide attempts, suicidal depression, or even mild depression in spite of the big giant spiel about how without meds, I was doomed to a life-time, of all of the above.

Heads, I win. Tails, I win. The minute that bipolar test-strip comes out, I’m going to find out if I cured my incurable genetic disease while carrying an active bipolar gene, and if I don’t have the gene, there is no one to litigate for malpractice.

In my post “The Baker Act Explained” I discussed something I called “the unstoppable gears of the machine” and “welcome to the system”. On my tai chi chuan blog, Big Bang Taiji, I referred to it as “The Grinder”.

I have some news about your Society Machine Grinder System Dystopia and you’re not going to like it.

Now that not-having insurance is unlawful, insurance coverage, if scouted down and resources used, can be obtained at no cost, on the Government’s dime, which is also your dime.

During the months I spent in lock-down undergoing medical torture with indiscriminate use of toxic body and mind damaging chemicals with an “Rx” label attached them, my father’s insurance was getting pinged for something like $700 to $800 dollars a day.

When I was asked when I was leaving, the triage nurses told me to go back to watching television on the couch and letting my pubescent glands, organs, and central nervous system stew in a teratogenic chemical mess called effective medical treatment.

When i got out, it was because my father’s insurance was tapped. It was gone. No more money. He couldn’t afford it, so only after thousands and thousands of dollars were extracted from his insurance and turned over to the psychiatric facility, was I released. It had nothing at all to do with whether or not I was better, and I wasn’t better after being forced to submit to chemical violation for nearly four months.

Since technically no one ever runs out of insurance in this country anymore, there is no need for Baker Acted patients, or any other psychiatric patients, to ever be released. Which means what? No American can *not* afford their polychemical brain altering medical formulas for all their DSM conditions. Cha-ching! The best business just became operating a private psychiatric facility with as many beds as possible. Bill the State for Medicare for everyone that walks through the door, make insane profits off the patient’s own tax-pool money. A perfect, perpetual closed-loop device.

Now that we have that unfortunate bite of reality out-of-the-way, let’s discuss briefly why there will never ever be a chemical test-strip you can buy over-the-counter, and test yourself in the privacy of your home, to see if you have the bipolar disorder genes or the bipolar disorder chemical imbalance profile.

I think we can agree, that having a proper medical diagnoses is the best policy for choosing to decide on a life-time of medications you are unlikely to ever stop taking.

Mental health educators and activists love to preach about “proper diagnosis” and all the private and government websites and resources describe or define the cause of manic depression/bipolar disorder as being:

  1. a genetic disorder
  2. a chemical imbalance

And more recently:

3. an issue related to the firing of the prefrontal cortex neurons

That’s great news, it means that you can rule out having manic depression by finding out that you do not have the manic depression gene. No gene, no diagnosis, no mandatory meds-for-life.

To be more scientifically thorough, you would augment your “Negative Gene Test” for bipolar disorder, with the chemical imbalance profiler. You pee on a test-strip, or prick your finger, and within a few minutes, one color says you are definitely chemically imbalanced, the other color means you are definitely NOT chemically imbalanced.

Now you have taken both the genetic and the chemical test for manic depression, and since you now have scientific evidence, proof-positive, that your body is free of both the manic depression gene clusters, and the bipolar brain chemical imbalance profile, you know for a fact you are scientifically off the hook for “needing’ to take bipolar medications.

But to be even more sure, before you take that first bipolar treatment pill, liquid, or injection, you also go and get your brain scanned at the nearest laboratory, to see if your brain-firing matches up with the brain-firing patterns of people with alleged bipolar brains.

If you test negative for all three, you don’t have manic depression, and you’re never at risk of being falsely misdiagnosed and indiscriminately medicated for life.

I would go so far as to offer that if you passed even one of those three tests, you have in your medical records, clinical proof you are not bipolar disordered or manic depressive. Joy. Right?

The current climate, is the unholy union of Pharma, to the American Psychiatric Association, paying all the patients it makes from the DSM out of your tax money via billing the US Government for all your meds you have to take forever on account of the multiple diagnoses you got, as every ten years or so, the DSM gets reworked in closed, private meetings with no oversight by people who are usually all paid consultants on or off the books of various Pharma Corps, to decide on what behaviors are diagnosable and therefore treatable/medicatable.

The goal, as stated in books like Kay Redfield Jamison’s “Unquiet Mind”, is to “save” people from a life of bipolar madness and manic suffering, and therefore the way to do that, is to look harder, look more often, look at younger and younger people, and broaden your idea of what bipolar disorder can be, rather than just think of it as something that “truly crazy” get, who are locked away all their lives in sanitariums.

Since the diagnosis is of behavior, and cross-referenced with an arbitrary scale, as long as the practice of diagnosing bipolar disorder does not get more exacting, more accurate, and more clinically scientific, then even more people can be diagnosed, since there is nothing but opinion with which to diagnose in the first place.

Thus, to make the most profits, and get the biggest bill pay-outs from all the people on Government insurance, the goal is not to make accurate bipolar chemical profilers, an exact bipolar genetics test, or a simple PET comparison of your brain vs established bipolar brain scan profiles in order to rule out the diagnosis.

It means it’s actually counter to both profits, and widening the net of people eligible to be diagnosed with an arbitrary, opinion-based diagnosis, to ever develop a definite brain scan test, chemical imbalance test-strip, or bipolar disorder gene finger-prick test, because doing so would make it absolutely scientifically clear who does and does not have manic depressive illness, thus making entire populations “immune” from fraudulent diagnosis, and ineligible to be force medicated forever with bipolar medications.

I am the author of the first petition to the United States Government to create, by federal mandate, a total ban on minors, children, teens, toddlers, and babies from ever being violated and polluted by psychiatric drugs. To make it illegal, unlawful and severely punishable to cause a child or person under the age of 18 to take, willingly or unwilling, coercively or otherwise, any psychiatric medication ever, to allow them the simple right to make it through their primary formative years without medical harm, medical dependency, and medical experimentation with or without informed consent.

Those of you who do not sign it, do not believe in my future of a world where only adults who make it to adult years with their intact and unpolluted bodies can make the decision after doing tons of research on all the psychiatric drugs, to decide to become part of the polypharmacy train-ride, or not, and not have the choice taken before they even knew they had it.

But the entire point of diagnosing children before the legal age to refuse psychiatric medications, is to rape them chemically. That is why the psych nurses and parents, and the pdocs just force-medicate children, and withhold important information about the dangers the drugs do, is to get the child’s body and mind violated while they are powerless, legally, mentally, and physically, to say “no”.

*Edited afterward to say that:

When my father’s insurance ran out and I was released, I was next placed in a State facility, entirely paid for by the taxpayer,  and my social worker told me that the plan was for me to spend my teens in the Toby Building, and when I became an adult, I would be moved to the Brown Building…

My social worker worked for the State. The taxpayer, pays the State. The State Facility is funded by the State’s tax-payer coffers. Once I was a ward of the State, I was assigned “invalid”, and there was no hope of ever leaving the Asylum Grounds and just being a normal teenager. My social worker went ballistic when I discovered that I had gained the legal right of consent, and used it to refuse consent to treatment for bipolar. She threatened me. Made notes in my file, and tried even mailed my father who had no custody rights over me, in a rage about my continual refusal to take meds, my “noncompliance”.

She never once listened to me at all. I was just a mentally ill teenager, and a Ward of the State, I was beneath her, and she viewed me as not normal, not human, not worthy of real care. She should have been at the very least impartial, but she took it personal that I would not go back on meds, and she also was paid by tax money.

In the Toby building, I spent at least three maybe four more months on those toxic drugs, and tried to hang myself in my closet in my cell while taking lithium as a mood stabilizer, and trilafondle as an antipsychotic/antidepressant.  Clearly the drugs did not work, and few adults seemed to care, or want to listen to me. And I have no memory whatsoever of my fifteenth birthday.

While I was in State’s Care, I was hospitalized again for six weeks for a “re-evaluation”, and was released with a clean bill of health. The cost of that mental hospital was even higher, something like $1000 per day, and since I was a Ward of the State, the taxpayers footed six weeks, times seven days at $1000 daily, for my social workers fishing expedition/failed attempt to get me back on medications.

It’s all a scam.

Posted by: Jane | September 5, 2015

Psychiatric Immunity Forever

The real treasure in my memoir of healing, is how to immunize yourself from psychiatry for the rest of your life. In my book and in posts on this blog I have said that during the time I was on lithium and trilafon, I was unable to accept the constant negative effects. I was never even fully informed, while medicated, how dangerous the drugs really were. Nobody told me about Tardives Dyskenisa – the condition where your nervous system starts glitching all the time, and stays messed up for the rest of your life.

You have to wonder why adults are allowed to learn all the effects of these drugs, and then proceed voluntarily? You know about TD, and you willing start taking Abilifry or Geodon’t? Are you out of your mind?

If the psychiatric nurses had told me about Tardives Dyskenisa I would have been horrified, and that is precisely why they didn’t tell me. I went through the symptoms. I am very lucky my CNS was not shot with a fatal bullet of medicine which left me twitching all the time. It turned out that I greatly needed that sensitivity for success at tai chi wrestling, and deep meditation, feeling my heartbeats, my blood-flow and cerebral-spinal fluid.

So you have coercive child psychiatry, and that’s just fine, because who cares, right? Who cares.

People get diagnosed with bipolar disorder 2, and go on support forums and cry about their suffering. It’s pathetic. You don’t do anything but take drugs. Half the interactions at Grohol’s bipolar forums is about mutual medication maintenance support and everyone talks about all the drugs they’re on.

Give me a break. Was that what you envisioned yourself as, growing up? Comparing your multiple bipolar meds on the internet? What a waste of your life. You’re peeing away precious unrecoverable life-moments going on about all the meds you took, knowing about the side effects because you did all the research on the internet like a good patient, and found out about all the horror stories and decided, sure, sounds fun, I think I will join the sisterhood of suffering side effects, it’s what everyone else does.

You want to discuss disease severity? I killed myself. They had to restart me in the ambulance. That is not only how bad my depression over my life was, but also I had no desire to spend my entire life a mentally ill person. How futile. How sad. How dis-empowered.

I get a second chance at life, and I spend every waking, non-working hour working on Ontology, the Study of Being. I had a direct experience of my soul when I looked down at my body as it was being loaded into the back of the ambulance. I knew experientially, that I was not my body, and in the Buddhist sense, I was truly looking down at my Mortal Shell, the organic vehicle of my spirit-form.

After waking up in the hospital and spending a couple months recovering and deciding on what to do, I concluded that the only way I could make a life that was worth living every day, was to go within, inside my bodily awareness sense, and deliberately remove stress. Every day became a spiritual and serious game of, “Let’s try to make it through the day without getting depressed, angry, or anxious.”

I fortified this with hours of meditation, daily. Seated, standing, yoga postures, gi gong movements, ba gua zhang circle walking, and tai chi chuan. All while meditating and relaxing, all the time.

My goal was to heal myself, first, of all mental illness – but I didn’t think of it as trying to cure PTSD, schizophrenia and manic depression at the same time. Instead, it was more like, “Now that I know (for sure) that I am an Energetic Consciousness, an Awareness-Being, a Phantom Energy-form inhabiting this damaged shell, can I find a way to live inside this Vehicle, this Mortal Body without trying to destroy it all the time? If I am a soul, a spirit, what can I do with that knowledge/sense/awareness?”

I put aside careers, marriage. I knew I had too many issues to get involved in relationships. I sure as hell wasn’t going to “identify” as bipolar or mentally ill. Each day that I got up, unangry, undepressed, unanxious, and did all the mind-body stuff Bellevue Psychiatric de-funded in favor of meds that never cure you, ever… changed me.

Some six months after my suicide resuscitation, I came out of my melancholia, naturally. I was fine. I was in the space between mania and depression, where there was no evidence whatsoever that I had three or so mental illnesses. Mental illness might seem like it has a grip on you 365 days a year, but it’s really like 300 days out of the year. You get a few days off where the sun shines, you’re not depressed or manic, you’re more or less normal.

On one of those days where my energy came back and I was motivated, I began my discipline of yoga/meditation/tai chi, every single day, two hours a day, minimal, but usually much more, until getting over my mental illness was a full-time job in the sense that I poured forty to sixty hours a week of my personal time to practicing mind-over-body training. That is how you actually attain a sound mind in a sound body. Imagine the shock of finding out that the way to deal with mental illness, is by working directly with my mind. How very radical.

Remember, that Bellevue Insane Asylum cut the funding for their experimental tai chi program, after it showed positive results in patients. They resumed the sit-around-on-meds-and-watch-tv-all day method, sans the tai chi that actually improved people. Why? How could you turn down functional medicine after seeing it work, in a mental institution of all places?

The real treasure in my book, is a blueprint, a plan, that will, if practiced like I did it, grant you immunity from psychiatry.

Posted by: Jane | September 5, 2015

Let them eat Prozium

Regarding the petition I started requesting Congress outlaw, ban, forbid, make unlawful and punishable the psychiatric drugging of American children, teens, and toddlers too…

I need everyone on this planet to be 100% behind the idea, the ethic, and the morality of simply allowing children to make it to their legal adult years without unnecessary medical damage, or medical dependency.

I know why you adults will refuse to take a stand with me, and put yourselves firmly on the side of “Leave the kids alone!”

It’s called self-gaslighting. It’s convincing yourself that something is happening, that isn’t – or that something isn’t happening, that is.

Why do you suppose I was lied to about Trilafondle and lithium?

Why do you suppose I was lied to about my “prognosis”?

Why do you suppose I was lied to about the scientific cause of my “genetic chemical imbalance”?

Why do you suppose I was told to take meds every single day of my life without fail, even if, (and I asked!) I went for prolonged periods without mania or depression?

The psych staff will say almost anything to get you to believe that you can’t ever come off manic depression meds. That the drugs are “prophylactic” protecting you from extreme bipolar events, and without those drugs, you’re doomed!

Except that didn’t turn out to be true. It’s like breaking a religious rule, and waiting to see if God hits you with a lightning bolt.

Once you’ve been diagnosed with the real manic depression, not the pathetic bipolar disorder 2 nonsense that people get so worked up about, I am talking the real deal manic depression that is diagnosed in an insane asylum like the old days, and not based on a referral you got after taking an “are you bipolar?” quiz on the internet. the psychiatric staff try to make you believe certain things about your illness, and you enter a whole new world of “compliance with your meds” versus “this patient is showing noncompliance, call a code!” It’s unreal. It’s actually quite disgusting.

I broke the Medical Faith they preached to me. I broke the psychiatric rules for survival for manic depressives. I did the most sinful, heretical and anti-psychiatric thing a patient who was diagnosed in an insane asylum can do – I dared to disbelieve in them and their pills – and chose to believe in myself.

And now I’ve written a book with the cure for Manic Depression within its pages.

Go ahead. Look at it. Read it. You will see that my psychology is far beyond yours.

I know why you won’t commit 100% in favor of banning psychiatric medications in children. You gaslight yourselves that the drugs are needed, and that they work. But if Prozac was such a functional anti-depressant, why do people stay on it for months, years, even decades? If you are still taking Prozac six months to a year after the initial prescription – your anti-depressant drug isn’t working.

Even if, I somehow got six million signatures and was personally received in Washington D.C. and allowed to plead my case before the Government, I am quite confident that a career politician possibly physically out of shape, and old, perhaps with glasses, perhaps even on psychiatric meds themselves, would stand up after my persuasive speech while holding my petition, and tell me, in a stern, but calm and reasonable voice, that there is a reason that Big Pharma was deregulated shortly before my medical torture on meds in the 80s, which was to:

A: get everyone on meds and create exactly this situation, a world filled with children, teens, adults and seniors all wandering through their lives from birth to death in an altered state of mind

B: make a lot of money

I’m quite positive Mr. Politician would thank me for my time and call the next speaker, and my petition would go straight into the trash while humans enter a new age of freedom called medication nation: always drugged, all the time.

Posted by: Jane | September 4, 2015

What if you could change the world for better?

I would love nothing more than to know that I was responsible for the petition that Congress approved, that permanently banned the use of all psychiatric drugs on children and teenagers. That is psychiatric reform.

The text of my petition in full:

As a teenager I was told I had to take toxic compounds called psychiatric medicine for the rest of my life. I was forced for six months to submit to having my body violated by Trilafon and lithium. The drugs hurt me internally and did not improve the quality of life. In fact, quite the opposite. As lithium was added to Trilafon, my suffering vastly increased, and my mental, emotional, and physical fitness degraded.

The drugs damaged my thyroid, liver, kidneys, pituitary gland, central nervous system and my pubescent reproductive organs. I was routinely lied to about my physiological need for these twin toxins, and the psychiatric staff never ever told me that I was risking kidney death and permanent neuromotor damage every single day I was on that stuff.

I was assured that the negative effects of the drugs would be temporary (they were not) and that if I just kept taking them, and did not discontinue, I would eventually reap the benefits of modern psychiatry for my unfortunate luck of having a genetic chemical imbalance.

That never happened. Instead I declined, and degraded and felt diseased. I was utterly unable to convince myself, that the disgusting physical malfunction I endured for those six months in my early teens, was “medicinal”. I learned about informed consent, and once I had the legal right to refuse medical treatment, I discontinued both drugs, and my physical and mental and emotional health rebounded.

I strongly feel that most children are not aware of the right to refuse consent to psychiatric drug treatment. I know for a fact, that psychiatrists, psychiatric nurses, and parents, all will routinely fail to disclose to children, what being a long-term user of psychiatric drugs can do to you, permanently. The cost, in medical complications like kidney dialysis, urinary tract infections, or what it means to wake up with permanent uncontrollable neuromotor twitches and electrical spasms in the body that can accompany the use of drugs like Trilafon, Haldol, Zyprexa, and Lamictal.

Years later, I never needed to go back on those drugs, and I count myself as fortunate that I got to keep my kidneys and my central nervous system integrity. The truth is, adults routinely lie to teens and children about the dangers of psychiatric drugs deliberately, to avoid scaring children out of compliance which is hugely manipulative and callous.

Adults can decide not to take the risk of psychiatric drugs, because they can weigh the pros and cons far better. Children are never even fully informed from the get go, which is criminal in itself, then, they are not allowed to say “No” to psychiatric drugs, and the damage they can do to your developing mind and body –  making them both unwilling victims of psychiatric coercion, as well as ensure a certain percent of children absolutely come down with iatrogenic (drug-caused) damage that is 100% avoidable from the start.

It is my personal belief that the use of psychiatric drugs of all kinds needs to be outlawed and made illegal, until a person reaches legal adult age, thus ensuring the child makes it to adulthood without unnecessary risk of medicine-damage, but also has time to develop self-skills to deal with stress, anxiety, and depression. It is the only way to be sure

This petition forces adults to realize their complicity in getting children medicated for no chemical or genetic reason whatsoever. I would have liked to have been fully informed of the dangers of both short and long term polypharmacy use, allowed to say, “No”.

Instead, the choice to join other people in a perpetually drugged reality was stolen from me. Since adults continue to do this to children, you are all complicit in involuntary child medical experimentation.

Posted by: Jane | August 15, 2015

Are you still bipolar after you die?

Here is a question for all you bipolars.

Since you identify as “being bipolar”, that is what you are.

Assuming you are one of those that believes in life after death,

and assuming you believe in a human soul…

Are you still bipolar after you’re dead?

Your spirit is wandering Heaven, and you meet other souls in Heaven – do you tell them how you are bipolar, or is that all out of the way now that you’re dead?

Think about it, because it’s related to being alive.

There are very few diseases or illnesses or disorders in existence where you identify yourself – as the condition.

If you have cancer, it is a disease state. You are not cancer.

If you have Alzheimer’s, you have a disease state. You are not Alzheimer’s

If you have malaria, you have a disease. You are not the disease.

With the exception of diabetes, where people say, “I am diabetic”, very few disorders cause people to identify their Self, their Person, their Being, as the disease itself. However, with bipolar, it is very common for people to identify, as “Being Bipolar”.

I can’t begin to express how pathetic and misidentified that is. It’s ridiculous.

But it is really easy to do, because when they changed the term for the condition from Manic Depression, (which names the illness as it’s defined – by it’s states of mania and depression) to Bipolar Disorder, it became a mind job. Everyone is, at some point, a little bipolar. We all, or most of us, have mood fluctuations, including excitement and depressions.

It is left in the hands of psychiatry to determine if your moods are “clinically disordered” and indicative of a disease pathology – which they never ever prove you have, neither genetically or chemically.

But you are diagnosed, that’s it. It time to redefine you entire life, your person, your Being, as a label, a modern psychiatric illness. From there you armchair diagnose people on the internet as being on or off their meds, or in need of meds adjustments, and you can pontificate to others how you finally got “properly” diagnosed.

Since it’s a chemical and genetic condition, why do you identify as being bipolar, and not having bipolar disease?

Because the disease label, the name, is so general, so plausible, that is has entered popular culture, manifesting in the most thoughtless and idiotic statements coming from the least qualified people, like, “she’s always moody, she’s so totally bipolar”.

Random people giving out driveby diagnoses on the internet or in real life conversations about a very serious topic: having, or not having, a brain-based, chemical and genetic incurable disease.

But bipolar has become utterly meaningless as a label for a major mood or thought disorder, precisely because it can mean anything now.

Consider your afterlife conversations as a bipolar person. I thought so little of living my life with an incurable disease, that first I tried removing myself from this world. Then I tried curing myself. I took the issue very seriously. It’s a shame that most of you never ever do anything drastic to deal with your bipolar, and just eat meds. And that’s what you can tell God when you go for Judgement.

You can say, “Thanks for the crappy bipolar disease body you gave me. I had to take meds all my life. I couldn’t wait to die, it was the only way I was ever getting off that stuff”

And you can thank psychiatry for convincing you to spend every second of every day from your diagnosis on outward, for the body and mind damaging drugs you “had” to take to treat your illness. So instead of living the amazing undrugged life of the nonbipolar, you got to walk around until the day you died in a lithium fugue and antipsychotic-induced brain coma.

Well done!

That fact that I cured myself of bipolar, or was monstrously medically mangled and misdiagnosed over something I was told was incurable, (and that I would have for the rest of my life), without any scientific evidence that would hold up in a clinical setting, other than connect the behavior to the symptom, diagnose out of the DSM, and proceed to lifelong medication management is an abomination. The fact that psychiatrists now do to young children what they did to me as a young teenager makes them monsters. The children do not have informed consent, and that’s why psychiatrists like drugging them when they are young and have no idea what they are in for.

That way the child’s brain, glands, and CNS are medically damaged and the child accepts the psychological programming, growing up believing they have to take polydrug management all their lives. It’s important to diagnose children before they reach the age of legal right of consent to medical treatment, and get them damaged on drugs as early in life as possible. It makes the most profits long term, and causes children to grow up not questioning their diagnoses and refusing meds, like I did at age fifteen, because neither the diagnosis, nor the meds, made any sense to me at all.

Being bipolar was not acceptable to me. And it’s not who I was, and it’s not who I am.

If you are bipolar, I feel quite sorry for you. You have profoundly and psychologically fallen for the preeminent psychiatric pseudoscience fraud of our time. Sucker.

I have a written a book detailing how to heal your mind of damage. To be specific, I have written the cure for mental illness. This cure is distillation of my method that I used to permanently heal from depression, PTSD, manic depression, and schizophrenia. That’s quite a claim, and I’ve state more than once, that I am willing to back up that claim, by heading down to Sarah Lazar’s Brain Scan Labs, and getting my frontal cortex mapped, the same way that Buddhist monks were imaged.

You see, psychiatry’s diagnosis of mind, mood, thoughts, and behavioral disorders hangs on very thin threads and assumption.

One of those assumptions, is that “bipolar is genetic”. So, profile my genes. I have all the requisite “artsy” genes that have come to be associated with people with disorders. I enjoy drawing, painting, singing, dancing, musical instruments, sculpting and movement arts like tai chi and ba gua. That means, according to the now stereotyped “classical” background of the manic depressive, i have the “art cred”.

Another of those assumptions, is that “bipolar is a chemical imbalance”. So brain chemicals are to blame then? They told me in 1989 it was a chemical imbalance. Guess what year it is? 2015 right? Still no specific brain chemicals have been identified as having been out of balance, causing bipolar.

The third major assumption floating around in psychiatry, is that mood and thought disorders are a result of a lack of development, or some “misfiring” or “mis-signaling” in the frontal and prefrontal lobes of the brain, and there is where I have psychiatry by the literal balls.

They have no genetic test, so testing my genes to find my (presumed) bipolar gene would be fraudulent science and waste of medical resources and time, because no doubt, I would share some genes with both people with and without bipolar, according to the gene test collection surveys that have been done. I personally, would love it, if they tested my genes, and found that I actually carried some or all of the genes that have been “implicated” in manic depression. The fact that I carried those genes and have been utterly without depression since the late 90s, is scientifically significant.

They could take my serotonin and dopamine levels at the time of the blood test, but since they have no scale, no graph, no disease progression time-table associated with the chemical imbalance theory, they can’t say, “Wow, look at this, some how Jane’s chemicals just never get imbalanced like what we see with bipolars”. Or even better would be,, “Hey look at this, Jane’s chemicals are, according to our graphs and charts, within active bipolar symptom range, yet, she has no depression, so how could that be?”

Once we examine, even in a shallow way, both the genetic and chemical imbalance theory, they literally fall flat, sounding like childish science, grasping at straws. A genetic and chemical test of my blood would baffle psychiatrists.

But we go right to the brain scan machines, right now, today, and strap me in, and get a read out in a PET of my neuron development as I practice meditation live, right in front of Joe Biederman, John Grohol and Kay Redfield, with Dr. Sarah Lazar standing watch, explaining what you are seeing in the scan.

Right there, the frontal lobe deficiency theory of mood and thought disorders gets shattered, right in front of your faces.

Since there are no chemical tests for the chemical imbalance, then it is perfectly plausible, that my “chemicals” have been “rebalanced”. You can’t make that assessment scientifically, because you have no concept of how they are “out of balance”, none at all!

Since there are no genes that we know, for sure, which “cause” or predispose you to bipolar; any genetic assay of my body comes out a waste of time. You can’t prove that I do or do not have bipolar, simply by sampling my genes, because there are no genetic profiles linked to causing bipolar, so you would not be able to clinically determine whether or not I had the genes for bipolar, and whether or not those genes were “active”.

On the other hand, by implicating genetic “expression” as a source for thought and mood disorder, you are basically positing that when certain genes flip or express this way or that, you “become bipolar”. But it is perfectly plausible under that theory, that a gene that has been activated, can be deactivated. So according to genetic theories, it’s entirely possible I somehow, through my lifestyle changes and my anti-stress meditation practices, caused the genes “giving me” bipolar, to un-express. To turn off. To stop. To flip into a dormant state. Because surely, by not having depression in all these years, the genes responsible for bipolar must somehow have been “turned off”. But you have no way to tell if that is true or not, so it’s both a total waste to say bipolar is genetic, because you can’t prove it, nor can you disprove my claim to curing bipolar by taking a sample of my genes.

So you can’t disprove my claim to curing manic depression by asking me to come down to a lab, and taking my blood work and peering at my genes and assaying my “chemicals”.  You would have nothing to show the cameras that proves whether I did or did not have bipolar, because you psychiatrists don’t know, yourselves.

That leaves the brain scan.

You bring all your favorite university pro-damaged frontal lobe mood disorder specialists, and observe as Sarah Lazar runs me through a PET scan, and compare my neural growth, to those that have been tested for bipolar, and schizophrenia, and cross-reference the patients brain scans, my brain scan, and the Buddhist monks brain scans, and it’s game over for psychiatry. Game over.

One could always theorize, since you psychiatrists are never ever wrong about anything – that I never had manic depression and schizophrenia to begin with.

Imagine that.

Consider the implications of that.

Because as we all know, there is no cure for the genetic disease chemical imbalance of manic depression and schizophrenia, right? Every one knows that. Ergo, i must have been misdiagnosed.

Misdiagnosis. Now that would be truly ironic.

That I was physically molested and assaulted by psychiatric nurses, for nothing.

That I was forced to undergo the death of personality and that the Russian Roulette Risk of Tardives Diskynisa on the drug “Trilafon” every day for six months of my adolescence, was for nothing.

That I was forced to accept toxic blood, toxic thyroid, toxic kidneys on lithium, every single day for six months, for nothing.

That I was forced to stay inpatient at the cost of $800 (in 1980s dollar value) per day, for over three, almost four full months in a long-term psychiatric asylum – for nothing.

That I was forced to live in Residential Treatment Group Homes for psychiatrically “disturbed” teenagers at the tax payers expense, spending time in solitary, spending time in useless group therapy, watching other patients act out and injure themselves or others or me, watch staff who were employed by the State and paid with your taxmoney, abuse and oppress us – for nothing!

That I was given psychiatric labels for life, told, I had in incurable disorder, and would REQUIRE lithium and neuroleptic combination treatment every day of my life from age fourteen on out – for nothing.

You had no tests for the diagnosis back then. All your tests had no results! No proof!

And you have no better tests, today. That is absolutely pathetic. That the simple act of a proper diagnosis for manic depression has not improved in any scientifically meaningful way in decades. That is ridiculous.

So there is really no such thing as a “proper” diagnosis. And if you can’t cure manic depression, (no one has explained why manic depression is incurable, that is, what makes it incurable), then you have to refuse the idea, that my book contains the cure for manic depression, that my brain contains the cure for manic depression, because it is scientifically impossible.

Which means I was medically harmed, medically injured, medically experimented on, for nothing.

Someone, somewhere in psychiatry, either owes me an apology, for sweeping someone who never had manic depression in the first place, into the psychiatric treatment machine, and subjecting me to the horrors of psychiatry that are the routine treatments for the poor sub-humans with mental illness, for blatant abusing a helpless fourteen year old child with medicine, for utterly no justifiable reason over twenty years later, that any one at Harvard or Hopkins would care to explain to me.

Or you owe me an apology for telling me it was incurable, when you psychiatrists have no idea what you are talking about.

Right now, you need to accept that I actually did cure manic depression without meds, using meditation, and you need to recognize that, and start propagating my book at top Universities. I will accept either an honorary doctorate from John Hopkins, or the Nobel Prize in medicine for radical invention and advancements to the study of psychology and psychiatry.

Or someone from those Universities needs to explain to me, how I never had bipolar to begin with, and all that psychiatric abuse was for nothing. The six months of drug torture, for nothing. The restraints, the isolation, the Individual Education Plan, the therapists, the lab tests, the lithium blood levels, all of it was medical malpractice. That I was an accidental victim. That those treatments and prognosis were not meant for me, only for real manic depressives. So sorry.

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