Hello there folks! I am writing this to welcome all my viewers and subscribers to my vlog.
My name is Jane and I talk about life with Bipolar, and life without Bipolar.
I wanted to say that real recovery from Manic Depression and other mental illnesses may be possible in your lifetime. It happened to me and I did not have kind of safety net, support network or therapists involved.
Here is a little video from my channel that I made as a bridge to guide my fellow bloggers to my vlog, and give my vlog viewers some blogging text to read.
I can’t wait to read more :)
By: Rose on December 15, 2007
at 6:05 pm
Hi Jane! Welcome to the blogosphere. You’re on my blogroll now—your youtube channel has been for a while.
By: giannakali on December 15, 2007
at 7:15 pm
Thank you for reading everyone!
By: Jane on December 16, 2007
at 12:14 am
First off, your blog is an inspiration!
Second off, I want to question one of your beliefs and hear your feedback:
I believe that the kind of healing you have done that has allowed you to live with your extreme highs and lows is a lifetime of healing. I fear that you could miss how high you are or could actually be going with publishing a book and making such a positive impact in so many people’s lives, that if all that was taken away from you, you could have a “relapse” that could be worse than any previous depression. How do you stay grounded / humble with successes?
By: self1healing on February 10, 2009
at 2:36 am
I only ask because I had a family member who spent his life training for the olympics and he was about to make it before an injury put him into a depression he never recovered from.
By: self1healing on February 10, 2009
at 2:38 am
I recognized your email address and I think you have commented before under a different username.
First thing I have for you is a question. Have you learned nothing from my writings about the nature of recovery? Did you not read my biography?
I am not dealing with or living with or coping with any level of highs and lows. For the last ten plus years I have been completely free of depression and mania. I am not holding back episodes through sheer will. They are gone as though I had never suffered them in the first place.
How did that happen? I explained all that in my 12 steps to bipolar recovery post. My brain has been structurally altered from what it was by the prefrontal cortex building power of meditation. My body has had over ten years to recover from the toxic states of depression and mania.
“that you could miss how high you are or could actually be going with publishing a book “
Have you not watched the video I made where I teach people exactly how to tell when they are going up and exactly how to reverse it? It’s called Bipolar Disorder: Preventing Mania Naturally
Has it occurred to you that through thousands upon thousands of hours of meditation that I might possibly have acquired an acutely sensitive internal radar which constantly gives me up to the minute feedback of my ongoing mental states?
Let’s assume, just for the sake of argument, that I had a relapse. Do you not think that I could reapply the same recovery strategy that healed me in the first place once again to a similar effect?
“worse than any previous depression”
Are you serious? What is worse than trying to kill yourself because you are imprisoned in psychiatric lockdown and you can’t get out? Worse than plotting to kill yourself a year in advance and then putting yourself in a brief coma as a result of an OD? I have already been as worse as depression ever gets.
“I only ask because I had a family member who spent his life training for the olympics and he was about to make it before an injury put him into a depression he never recovered from. “
Let’s talk about that. Your family member’s mind and personality was entirely wrapped up in his identity as an athlete. When that was taken from him, he had no other internal identity or security or purpose to fall back on. He put all his personality eggs into one basket and it cost him.
Do you honestly think that after ten thousand hours of meditation my self identity and inner purpose is so fragile? Did you not read about the part where I became very happy and very content living very poorly, alone and very simply? My identity was and is not wrapped up in social status, my career, my income level or anything else. I became happy with absolutely nothing going on in my life.
My inner purpose and self worth is not tied into this recovery work or my impending book.
This whole success/fame thing has not yet happened. It’s a bridge I will only cross if it actually happens. It’s a little early and presumptuous to assume that because I am writing a book and starting to get attention that I must be sailing out into mania.
What you have done is project your experience with your family member and you tossed on some bipolar bible passages onto me.
The changes I made to my brain and personality with my recovery strategy make it impossible for mania or depression to simply materialize out of nowhere. If I were to become unstable it would not happen overnight. It would be a gradual occurrence that I could see coming from a distance because I am always paying attention to my inner world.
That’s not to say that I am somehow immune to tragedy. Certainly if I got totaled in a car accident I’d probably be depressed. That’s not something you would chalk up to a bipolar relapse. If anyone were physically wrecked in an accident, you expect them to be depressed.
If I was depressed again, I would start my recovery all over from scratch. Knowing that I have already succeeded with this method, my recovery would probably be even faster the second time around.
Finally, during the great meditation experience in my mid 20s I discovered unconditional self love. There is nothing that can take from me. I know who I am and what I am and I am content to simply exist without fame or fortunes in the sanctuary of my inner heart and mind.
That self love is why suicidal depression is not even remotely imaginable. My heart protects me. My inner purpose is not bound up in this book. You can strip away any fame or success I might acquire from this book and I will still be me, happy and content with being a nobody.
By: Jane on February 10, 2009
at 9:53 am